Why self-care is not enough

2 years B.C (before Covid) I tuned into Organisational Psychologist Adam Grant, cautioning the downsides of being an “engaged workaholic”. He confessed he was one. Engaged or not, the word ‘holic’ is a warning sign about negative long-term impacts of stress on wellbeing. It is not sustainable.

How are you feeling?

Engaged employees had two weeks’ vacation and guess what? They are still tired. Business is great but energy is waning, and resilience is no longer enough to get them through.

A couple of weeks off does not cancel the toll of two intense years.

You are not alone.

Enter the ‘Engagement Paradox’. Engagement and wellbeing used to trend together. When one was high so was the other but no longer. We have people with high engagement and high stress.

Years back I was chronically exhausted on the fast-track to burnout as I struggled to manage menopause, work and life. More than one health professional told me to up my “self” care and reduce stress. If I had the energy, I may have committed an act of violence.

So it’s my fault is it?

I should be able to self-care my way out of it.

Would you tell you of 12 months ago to do more self-care when you had lemons flying at you? What about making more lemonade as you were scrambling to meet deadlines and stay focused on a ridiculous number of zoom calls.

Burnout results from chronic stress. Burnout steals mojo, confidence and optimism. It is a workplace issue. I am calling bullsh*t on self-care being the solution for people or businesses.

Self-care is not cutting it.

Consider your life right now – your work and your wellbeing. 

Putting the responsibility on employees is heavy and blamey. When drinking more water is where it is at, the pressure for more self-care is disempowering. 

You know those days when exercising is the last thing you feel like?

Again, you are not alone. The disconnection and recovery challenges are real. Stick with me here and I will explain.

Work stressors  are  ‘Work characteristics and events that elicit strain reactions that may lead to negative implications for health and well-being’ Ganster and Rosen, 2013, Griffin and Clarke, 2011, Kahn and Byosiere, 1992.

Recovery is the antidote to work and life stress.

“Recovery can be seen as a process opposite to the straining process during which short-term strain reactions are alleviated so that they will not result in more longer-term impairment of well-being”. (Craig & Cooper, 1992)

You with me? Makes sense until the oxymoron drops.

Enter the ‘Recovery Paradox’ which is when necessary recovery processes are impaired when job stressors are high. (Bennett, Bakker, & Field, 2018)

It takes two to tango and thrive.

Burnout proof companies have high engagement and wellbeing but data shows most have high engagement AND high stress. Companies are seeing this trend in Employee Engagement data. The good ones are working with their people to recognise work stress and ideate solutions together. They know it takes more than self-care to overcome the Recovery Paradox and restore wellbeing.

From “self” care to “we” care.

Before you look in the mirror and tell yourself to “raise your self-care game”, try a “we” care action which might look like this:

           • An endorsed meeting free day (and other work conditions).

           • Backfilling roles with great talent.

           • Scoping and sizing roles for the now (job design).

           • Leaders role modelling boundary setting (no I cannot meet at 9PM).

           • Well-being resources, tools and support that helps.

I hear the fruit bowl is not cutting it either but surely good coffee on tap helps?

I would love to hear what you are doing in the “we” care space?

Be a great mate and forward this growth love to others who might enjoy.